Supporting The Parent/Child Relationship In Next Gen Ministry

We are talking about the importance of Next Gen leaders honoring the family relationship between parents and children.

Have you ever been in a situation where a teenager says to you, “I wish you were my dad or I wish you were my mom?”

That is a difficult position to be in because we love our students and want to help them but we must handle this very carefully for several reasons.

As a Next Gen Leader, there are things we can do to build the parent/teen relationship and support the family.

Because of the disintegration of the family in America, we need a commitment in Next Gen to build the vital relationship of the parent and child.

As Malachi said in his prophecy concerning the end times revival, family is the precursor to the Next Great Awakening. And, because if the destruction of the family, I believe one of the most effective ways to reach Gen Z is to promote healthy family ministry.

Here is the first principle to help promote healthy relationships between your students and their parents:

1. We cannot be parents or surrogates to our students

God placed us in their life as helps, extra, and shepherds (and shepherds do not bear sheep). BUT we are not their parents…

We cannot be what God designed someone else to be. Only God and their parent can fill that void. To take the place of a parent or replace a parent will cripple their growth, and ultimately, put them at a disadvantage as they become parents in the future.

They must right that relationship and we must help them to fix this on their own.

Whether the relationship is healthy or unhealthy, the most important relationship a teenager has is their parent or guardian.

We must recognize our role as support and extra and steer kids to the healing of that most important relationship!

2. Supporting parents in the child’s eyes

Whether the parents are healthy or not we must support the parent/child relationship. They are who God chose as the parent for a reason.

The solution to the parent/child relationship is to steer them, guide them, and teach them how to be a loving and obedient child. We must help students see the value of their parents and that God place them in their life for a reason.

The command to honor your parents will always be rewarded - it is a commandment from Moses, and, Paul said it will be well with you and you will live long on the Earth. It’s the only command with a promise attached to it.

Honor is given and respect is earned. The command to honor must happen in every family circumstance. Honor is not based on what parents do or don’t do, honor is based on the position they are in as a parent.

Speak healing and positive words over the family. Speak what you want your family to look like and not what you are currently seeing. Speak life and not death, blessings and not curses.

As leaders, we should be mindful of abuse. Obviously, we are never asking students to stay in abusive situations.

3. Supporting the child in the parent’s eyes.

The number one problem in America is the family. And thankfully, the number one solution in America is the family.

As Next Gen leaders we must make sure that we have a plan to promote these simple principles that build healthy families. To equip parents with the tools to lead their families.

The responsibility of the parent/child relationship begins with the parent. Paul is very strong with this in Ephesians chapter 6:

“Children, obey your parents because you belong to the Lord, for this is the right thing to do. ‘Honor your father and mother.’ This is the first commandment with a promise: If you honor your father and mother, ‘things will go well for you, and you will have a long life on the earth.’”

Paul’s says also, “Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger by the way you treat them. Rather, bring them up with the discipline and instruction that comes from the Lord.” ‭‭Ephesians‬ ‭6‬:‭1‬-‭4‬ ‭NLT‬‬

One practical theological principle is to challenge parents and their maturity to not provoke their children. To not press them or push them or exasperate (to make things worse by irritating or frustrating them).

Parents should be prayers, peacemakers, and problem-solvers in the home

Putting these simple practices into place will help us give this generation the tools they need to build healthy families.

Because healthy PARENTS build healthy FAMILIES that build healthy CHILDREN and build healthy SOCIETIES.

Fourty-one years ago, Ronald Reagan said that “If we want to fundamentally change a nation, it begins at the dinner table.”

The responsibility of Next Gen leaders to promote healthy family relationships is maybe one of the most impacting principles of our work.

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