5 Practices of Healthy Small Group Leaders

Last week we talked about small group fails and mistakes made in the small group setting. We talked about 4 failures: 1. A lack of theology in the content, 2. When a leader takes over and dominates discussion, 3. When there is no time for response or accountability, and 4. When the small group simply becomes a chat session.

I truly believe we have lost theology and discipleship in youth ministry, and ultimately, theology and discipleship in the small group.

And the statistics have proven that under the format of small groups the last two decades, the theology of a generation has actually plummeted.

And what did this get us? A dramatic spiraling drop of the biblical worldview in the Gen Z set that hit rock bottom at 4%. Down from 19% in the Millennial generation before them.

Sure, the blame for this lies squarely on unhealthy homes also. But, youth ministry cannot escape this responsibility of the plummeting biblical worldview in Gen Z.

Here are some more statistics:

•The oldest Americans are 84% Christian and the younger Gen Z is 34% Christian

•Of the oldest Americans, only 9% were UN-affiliated with a religion, while 48% of Gen Z is UN-affiliated with a religion.

•Gen Z is the first generation in history in which the nones clearly outnumber the Christians.

•They have also the highest percentage of Atheists recorded in American history.

Teenagers require creative approaches when it comes to spiritual formation and discipleship. With that in mind, youth leaders should be as intentional as possible when it comes to the recruiting and retention of small group leadership.

One of the traits that sets apart healthy small groups is a healthy small group leader. So that requires a youth leader to be proactive in equipping small group leaders. With resources, training, and ongoing development.

The following are 5 traits of a healthy small group leader:

1. A healthy small group leader understands the Art of the question

In the gospels, Jesus asked more than 153 questions. That is significant. And it was a major emphasis of His.

Ask questions that are relative periodically throughout the teaching. And be prepared to restate your questions.

Learn to re-ask questions. It helps to write out a question two or three different ways, so that teenagers can understand the question better.

Do not be intimidated by silence. Normally, silence happens when students are thinking, when students are waiting for someone else to speak, or if I have asked a bad question.

Type questions on a piece of paper and have the group take time to answer them. Then, have the group turn them in and you read them.

Do a live Q and A at the end of your teaching

Jesus asked more than 153 questions and I’m sure we could come up with a few ourselves.

2. A healthy small group leader is creative

Kinesthetic small groups are the best learning setting. Where all of our faculties are used in the learning process. That would include sight, sound, touch, smell, taste, and other physical and mental abilities to learn.

Here are some creative elements for small group leaders:

Writing assignments…

-Create a Word Cloud and write down as many words as you can that relate to the topic

-Write a letter to someone that you must forgive

-Make a list of the things that you must stop doing and give it to someone in the group for accountability

-Have the entire group text you an answer to the topic question and then read the answers

Breakout into groups…

-Announce the topic at the beginning of the group. Then, give the group a chance to discuss the topic before you speak on it

-Give each group a piece of paper with a part of the teaching on it and have them talk about it and bring their findings back to the whole group

-Have an inspirational quote from your topic typed up and give it to each of the group members to put in an important place where they can read it often

-Ask the group to come up with ways to apply the teaching. Then, have the groups share those practical ways with everyone.

Object lessons…

-Have the whole group wear a t-shirt the next week that relates to the topic of study (you will have to tell them ahead of time what the topic is going to be)

-Right after the lesson, have the group find an object in the room … a purse, a backpack, or wallet, or a plant. Demonstrate how the object relates to what they have learned in the lesson.

-Place an apple in a paper lunch bag and seal it in front of the group. Over the next month teach about how things can get into our life and make us rotten. At the end of the topic series, open the bag in front of the whole group. And be prepared for the reactions!

-When teaching on surrender, collect everyone’s purse, wallet, keys, and cell phone. Ask them to think about how they felt when something valuable is taken away from them. Then give them back at the end of the lesson.

Videos…

-Use the following places to find great videos for discussion of your topic:

Movie, Ted.com, Youtube.com, Vimeo.com, and Google.com

3. A healthy small group leader is a listener

The temperature and culture of every small group changes weekly. The emotions from the lived experiences of the group that day will affect the small group. It is important for leaders to read the room and to listen.

Listen to when a student makes a statement that everyone else needs to hear. And repeat that statement and ask for feedback. That will help students to feel that when they speak what they say is valued.

I also learned to encourage or honor a student after they make a comment. By saying, “I love that thought Adam. What a great thought.” Everyone else in the group is going to feel that encouragement and want to say something next!

Listen to a story of a student and ask questions about the story.

Ask the group to respond to the statement that somebody just made. That will let everyone know that you are listening, and not ready to move on to the next point in your outline.

The small group leader is not a lecturer. He or she is a moderator. A small group leader must get beyond lecturing. This is not a one-way presentation. This is a dialogue and conversation between the entire group and the leader. I like to call the small group setting “the university of learning“.

This is where everyone’s background and upbringing shapes how they feel about the world around them. This kind of peer learning is powerful. Of course, we need rabbis, but peer learning is special.

4. A healthy small group leader values the supernatural

Week after week small groups take place and there is never any room for students responding to the material, to worship, or to the presence of God. Where are our students going to learn how to worship? Where will they learn the gifts of the Spirit? Where are they going to see and not just hear God?

When is the last time you prayed for healing or for the supernatural in your small group? If our students are not learning the gifts of the Spirit in the small group, then the small group is replacing a very important element of Christianity – the presence of God.

One of the key characteristic traits of Gen Z is their love of the supernatural. Whether it’s movies or books or music, Gen Z loves the supernatural. The number one movie right now in America is Supernatural. There are over 50 supernatural-themed movies and shows playing right now.

And, think about it, we cannot separate Christianity and the supernatural. Is there a greater connection to a generation than the supernatural of Christianity!?

Instead of taking prayer requests, and the leader praying, we need to take prayer request, have the person stand in the center of the group, and have the whole group pray. That is the purpose of small group. Participation.

That leads me to my last trait of a healthy small group leader.

5. A healthy small group leader is a facilitator of participation.

Again, small group is not a lecture. This is a dialogue and a conversation. It is much easier for students to be spectators in the large group setting. But, what we do not want, is that they become spectators in the small group setting.

Another thought here is that students are in small groups at school 35 hours a week. They’re split up in the classrooms and transition in and out of subjects all week long. Is that really what we want to do when they come back to youth group?

If you look at education today, there are a lot of group projects, hands-on/laboratory settings, and creative and tactile forms of learning. I don’t think the church should be any different.

Is there a point when students can only sit so long listening to a leader speaking 80% of the time and students dialoguing 20% of the time in the group? Because that’s what most small groups end up being like.

Small groups must become a laboratory… Where our students are able to use the gifts in a smaller setting. Where they can fail and learn. Where they can see God move in that setting and not just in the big convention or camp setting.

Can you imagine the impact of just one miracle in the small group?

Finally

Again, I’m not down on small groups. I’m down on poorly run small groups. Use some of these practical ways to build healthy small group leaders.

Because, the small group leader is the key to the success of the small group. Healthy small group leaders, build a healthy small groups.