5 Practices Of Healthy Families
Healthy families raise healthy children who build healthy society’s.
The family is the number one problem in America. And the family is the number one solution in America.
The family is what shapes every society on earth. For this reason, the family is the greatest evangelism tool the church has ever had. First, because the family has the responsibility of raising disciples/children who will lead in every sector of society. And second, because the family lives in the community context and has immediate access globally.
I’ve been praying God would use this moment of the COVID-19 pandemic to turn the family around in America. Seeing our families across this nation spending so much time together is going to impact our nation in a profound way.
We may not see it for years, but, this Quarantine is going to create healthier families and children who will marry and create healthier families and children of their own.
Practical Family Dynamics
This week I saw a teenager post this on Instagram, “I’m actually liking this time off because we never spend this much time as a family.“ I think a lot of people feel this way right now.
Here are a few things you can do to create healthy families during this quarantine:
1. Healthy Marriages and Parenting
The parents in a home model honor, respect, communication, and authority. When the marriage and the parenting relationship is healthy then the family will be also. Maybe you are in a traditional home with both biological parents present, or, a blended home, or even a home with a single parent. There is no default home in America because our families are quite diverse.
I have often watched the best kids come from the worst homes and the worst kids come from the best homes. A healthy family is a matter of parental leadership and authority. Build a loving and accepting space that your children will want to run home to!
2. The Family Table
What a place of impact! When the family creates a meal together magic happens. At this time of the pandemic, there are no excuses for eating together. However, maybe when things return to normal this is a discipline that continues to happen twice or three times a week. The conversations that take place around the table will change your family dynamic.
We always had a rule in our home - you can talk with food in your mouth! This is the place where everyone finds out how everyone is doing. A family conversation around the table is very important and builds relationships and identity and trust.
Here are a few great questions to start conversation:
-What was the highlight (or lowlight) of your day?
-What do you have planned this evening or this weekend?
-How are classes going? Sports teams? Work?
-Who’s your best friend right now? Why?
-Is there something you need from me that I’m not providing for you?
-What has God been showing you lately?
-Tell me about your future. What do you want to do with your life?
3. Sibling Relationships
We have lost the sibling relationship in our homes over the last 25 years. I can remember growing up with my brothers and sister and the impact they had on my life. Siblings have a special way of impacting our lives through conversation, accountability, and understanding.
We're not just raising a fatherless or a motherless generation anymore. We are raising a sibling-less generation now. Help our families build healthy relationships with each other by setting up family meetings, having siblings pick each other up from events, and helping with homework.
4. Family Recreation
When is the last time you had a family vacation? My children still talk about vacations that we took years ago. Every family could use more memories, laughter, and education. Family vacations can create all of these things.
The inspiration that comes from family recreation can also take place with movie nights, board games, and yard games that cost very little or nothing.
Maybe you need to get creative and have a stay-cation in your area that lasts the weekend and doesn’t cost that much. Or maybe a day-cation to do things like a day event at a museum or to the park. My son who lives in Los Angeles takes his three kids to get donuts every Saturday morning! Something tells me they will never forget this.
5. Community Involvement
Doing community involvement is a great education in the home. This could include your involvement at church or parachurch organizations. Maybe you go to a local shelter or a food kitchen to help serve the homeless. Or maybe you volunteer at a local nonprofit. There are all kinds of ways for a family to be present in the community where they live.
Our family committed to providing meals at Thanksgiving. We would go to the grocery store and let the kids choose the groceries and then deliver them to a family in need.
Another great way to have an impact on the community is to be involved with the activities and events in your area. Church missions/events, sports teams, fine arts programs, or club involvement are easy to attend because our children are involved already.
Try getting involved with the local schools and meeting other parents, teachers, coaches, and even your neighborhood organizations.
Finally
Not sure how you are feeling right now. Maybe overwhelmed or unqualified or guilty.
But I think all of us could take some time to create new patterns in our homes during this quarantine. As a family, we FaceTimed again this week and it was so great watching my grand-sons at home with my kids. Yes, it was chaos! We laughed so hard.
Remember, kids don’t care about this virus. They just want to play. They just want their parents to be around. They just want to eat and spend time together. Create a healthy family by practicing this five disciplines and watch the impact it has on our nation.
Healthy families raise healthy children who build healthy society’s.